Surf and Turf -- Restaurant Iris, Memphis, TN
For
our final Memphis Best Thing I Ever Ate dining experience, Vodka and
friends decide to employ Uber to drive us ten minutes down the street so
that our designated driver, Whiskey Sour, can have a cocktail (or
preferably, two or three).
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| "FINALLY" --Vodka |
When said Uber driver arrives, he proceeds to
get inexplicably lost in a parking lot, performing multiple U-turns and
causing Vodka's trigger rating finger to rest squarely above two stars.
 |
| Buddy, You Are Literally Taking Us RIGHT DOWN THE STREET. Pull It Together |
And
then he finds "I Want It That Way" on the radio, cranks it up to a
deafening volume, and instigates a full-on singalong among the four of
us, and (even more miraculously) gets us to our dinner destination
without too much more grief.
 |
| One Star for Driving, Five Stars for Soundtrack Selection |
"Way to be saved by the
Backstreet Boys, buddy," we mumble as we slide out of his car and
through the door of Restaurant Iris, home of Claire Robinson's Best
Thing I Ever Ate GUILTY PLEASURE dish, the surf and turf. Now compared
to the other places we have ventured so far on this trip, Restaurant
Iris is much classier.
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| A Festive Table Which Does Not Belong to Us |
Located in a converted Victorian-type house, the
space is instantly charming, and we settle down at a corner table to
properly complete our weekend in Memphis.
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| Almost Got Run Over By Our Own Uber Driver While Trying to Nab This Shot |
And then they turn on the air.
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| Nothing Like Adding More Draft to a Drafty Old House |
Now
Vodka, who typically has fire running through her veins, is not easily
put off by a smattering of cold air, but the wind flowing from the vent
directly below our table is particularly icebergian in nature. It's so
intense that our entire tablecloth begins blowing toward the ceiling, causing
Diet Coke to scramble in a mad dash to get away from it.
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| We Didn't Realize This Place Came With Its Own Weather Pattern |
Eventually,
our waitress places a cocktail menu over the vent in order to shield us
from its wrath, but not before Vodka has ordered the Boulevardier, and
Whiskey Sour, a glass of Chardonnay.
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| Not a Very Hearty Pour on the Chardonnay There, Iris |
For dinner, Diet Coke chooses the
lamb shank pappardelle, Whiskey Sour the Gulf Shrimp curry, and Vodka, the
specified surf and turf, which consists of a New York Strip steak
stuffed with fried oysters and blue cheese.
 |
| Herein Lie the Actual Descriptions, as Vodka Does Not Feel Like Typing Them |
And as
heavy and decadent as that sounds after two full days of non-stop
consumption, at the very least, Vodka is grateful that it doesn't
feature pork or chicken.
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| Beef: It's What's For Dinner. Thank Goodness |
As we await our entrees, we
are each given a deliciously warm roll to munch on, along with an amuse
bouche of something that looks like a miniature avocado toast.
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| Again, We've Reached the Point in Our Trip Where We Stop Paying Attention to What We Jam in Our Mouths |
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| This Is Bread |
And when
the surf and turf arrives -- apparently one of the only dishes here
which is never rotated off of the menu -- it looks just as ridiculous as
described.
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| Well, This Should Last Vodka At Least Three Days |
A solid hunk of meat rests in the middle of the plate,
sliced horizontally down the middle and stuffed with fried oysters and
chunks of blue cheese.
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| How, Exactly, Does One Eat This Thing? |
What looks like a blue cheese hollandaise sauce
coats the top and spills over the side, and the whole thing rests atop a
bed of diced potatoes.
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| Somebody Please Send Assistance |
In other words, it's A LOT.
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| Ate All The Oysters and Five Bites of the Steak |
Tasting
the dish reveals it to be good, if a bit overly decadent. The steak is
nicely cooked, the fried oysters are lovely (if sparse, compared to the
other ingredients), and the blue cheese adds an interesting tang to the
proceedings. But after a few more bites, the fact that the blue cheese
seems to have seeped into every pour of the meat means that it starts to
have an overpowering effect on every thing else happening on the plate.
Is this dish good? Yes. Interesting? Yes. But would we order it again?
No.
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| And Speaking of Decadent, Iris Doesn't Really Seem to Do Anything Halfway |
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| Do Airlines Allow To-Go Bags on Board? |
Of the three dishes at hand, Vodka prefers Diet
Coke's lamb shank pappardelle, and she would certainly return to try
other items on the menu. But the surf and turf, as guilty pleasurable as
it might be, just may feature too much guilt for not enough pleasure.
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| The Cocktail Though? Absolutely No Guilt There |
And
while we enjoyed Restaurant Iris, it can't hold a candle to our true
favorite place in all of Memphis, the Peabody Hotel, home of not only
the famous Duck March, but also of an ornate lobby bar complete with
chandeliers, piano playing, and an extensive cocktail list.
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| Our Top 5-Star Choice of the Trip |
So if you
ask us, the Peabody should be the number one Best Thing I Ever Ate
feature in Memphis. And if the Food Network doesn't agree, well, we
don't really give a quack.
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