Omni Parker House
Vodka is fairly certain that the Omni Parker House in Boston must have been part of the inspiration behind Disney World's haunted mansion ride, as she is pretty sure that a ghost hitched a ride with her back to Manhattan.
Initially, my accompanying friend had scoffed at the notion that the place is haunted, as told to me by my eternal best pal, the trolley tour guide. However, it only takes us one look around the hotel to convince ourselves that the rumor is correct: the Omni Parker House is operating only partially in this stratosphere.
We are here for Vodka's last stop on her marathon tour of Boston Best Thing I Ever Ate locations to consume Beau MacMillan's chosen REGIONAL FAVORITES dish, the Boston cream pie. But between the dark lighting, beyond vintage furniture, creepily deserted hallways, and the eeriest Christmas music ever created, we are convinced that Beau must have a secret Ghost Hunters fetish.
|Boston Cream Pie: The Original Ghostbuster|
|And Preparing Ourselves for a Ghostly Visit|
"Are there any you don't want?" she asks with the slightest hint of a growl.
"Blueberries," my friend answers, as if this is a perfectly logical request. The waitress retreats to fetch our cocktails and our cream pie, a now permanent berry-induced scowl on her face.
|Going on a Deep-Sea Dive In Search of Blueberries|
"How do you say the fruit that's also a color?"
"No, not plum. It's not yellow, it's not red...."
Finding herself on the losing side of "moron," Vodka changes the subject to begin photographing the provided bar snacks: peanuts and wasabi peas. When her friend continues to lean over the table, impacting Vodka's lighting, she snaps, "You're shadowing my nuts," a phrase that our already hostile waitress is privy to as she arrives just in time with our (thankfully devoid of blueberries) cocktails and pie.
|Clearly, We Were the Joy of Said Waitress's Night|
|This Plate Probably Looked Well-Assembled In Its Last Lifetime|
|Somebody Give the Whipped Cream CPR|
That phrase bears repeating, based on the fact that this dessert is called a Boston CREAM pie: "just a hint of cream in the middle."
Dear Parker House, Did your ghosts eat the rest of the cream filling?!
|Time to Call in the Search Party|
|Plate of Fail|
|Advertisement Not Sized to Scale|
Omni Parker House's Boston Cream Pie: 3 stars