As
a general rule, either due to our own stubbornness and/or our bodies'
refusal to admit that they have ventured outside of New York City, we
are incapable of adjusting to West Coast time.
 |
| What Is This Strange World and Where Are the Pigeons? |
For this reason, despite
the fact that we hadn't gone to bed until 2:00am NY time (and had been full on a burger and French fries, to boot) we are WIDE AWAKE at the crack of 4:00am in San Francisco.
 |
| Insert the Twiddling of the Thumbs |
And unfortunately for us, our itinerary doesn't have us scheduled to be anywhere until 9:00am. Not just because we thought we'd be sleeping in, but because NOTHING IS OPEN.
 |
| Little Pig, Little Pig, Let Us In! |
In
the four hours we have to kill before our first meal ("meal") of the
day at Buena Vista Cafe, Vodka completely rewrites our itinerary, and we
end up on a double-decker bus tour by ourselves the second said bus
starts running (sadly for Vodka, this is her third -- THIRD -- time on a
bus tour all by her lonesome. She is starting to take this pattern
personally).
 |
| Um, Nice Cone "Art" |
By 8:55am,
we have been driven up the San Francisco hills and are stationed
outside of Buena Vista Cafe, waiting for them to open so we can start
chugging Tyler Florence's favorite BEST I EVER DRANK Irish coffee, and
stat.
 |
| Are You Open Yet? Okay, How About Now? And Now? Now? |
When the Buena Vista staff opens the front doors, we
scurry inside and over to the eating section of the counter (although we
have a full food itinerary booked for the day, our next meal is not
scheduled until noon,
and clearly, we cannot last another three hours).
 |
| Might You Also Have a Historical All-You-Can-Eat Buffet? |
Our waitress, who is
beyond pleasant, appears before us, and we each order an Irish coffee,
along with a bread bowl of New England clam chowder to share (and the
waitress, to her credit, does not so much as sneer at our bizarre and
rather cheap ordering practices).
 |
| Believe Us When We Say We'd Order Three Of These If We Didn't Think We'd Explode |
The Irish Coffee Man (which does not have
the same ring to it as "Bread Boy" or "Wine Guy," but his function is
just as important) begins creating the Best Thing I Ever Ate delicacy in
a long line of glasses at the other side of the bar, and within
moments, we clink our beverages together in cheers.
And with our first sips of this coffee, we have only one thing to say: "Waitress, bring another round."
 |
| The Sort of Assembly Line Work We Can Get Behind |
Now,
neither of us are exactly whiskey connoisseurs, and Ginger barely even
drinks coffee at all, due to the profound jittery effect it has on her
nervous system. But we know enough to proclaim that these Irish coffees cannot be beat.
 |
| Elixir of the Gods |
Vaguely sweet,
they manage to be refreshing and warm at the same time. The cream
topping maintains its foamy body through the entirety of the
drink, and it is all we can do not to chug the creation and chain-drink
the Irish Coffee Man's masterpieces for the rest of the day.
 |
| How Many of These Is It Socially Acceptable to Drink at This Hour? |
By the time our sourdough bread bowl of soup arrives, we
are becoming decidedly hammered and giggling like fools to ourselves
about taking our whole "It's not even noon somewhere" concept to a whole new level (being that the time is currently, oh, 9:15am).
 |
| It's Important to Stay Hydrated, Even When Doing Some Mid-Morning Boozing |
The clam chowder itself is pretty good -- that is, after we (yes,
Ginger included) douse it with about an entire shaker of salt ("We're
getting old. Our tastebuds are already dimming").
 |
| When In New England... Oh Wait |
 |
| Pre-Salt Attack |
The bread bowl
itself is a bit stiff (presumably because, you know, it has to HOLD
SOUP), but overall, we are more than satisfied.
 |
| Apparently Our Teeth Are Also Growing Flat |
By the time we stumble out of
Buena Vista Cafe, two Irish whiskeys each to the wind, Ginger is singing
-- SINGING -- "Tomorrow" from Annie, and occasionally interrupting her
own Andrea McArdle moment by calling out, "Well, now I'm feeling
CHIPPER!"
 |
| Bet Your Bottom Dollar That Tomorrow, There'll Be Booze |
It seems we have discovered why San Francisco people are so
much more shockingly pleasant than folks in the rest of the country --
they begin their days at Buena Vista Cafe inhaling Irish coffees under
the guise of needing a "caffeine fix."
 |
| Hi, Yes, Might You Have a To-Go Cup? |
And we, too, can now solidly attest to the fact that
rather than Folgers, the best part of waking up is whiskey in
your cup.
*Certifiable Best Thing I Ever Ate
No comments:
Post a Comment