Monday, June 18, 2012

Off the Map: That Was Good Eatin'

Bacon with Cheese Oven-Baked Omelette -- Walker Brothers Original Pancake House, Chicago, IL
Walker Brothers Original Pancake House

"Let's go look at the fake ocean."

"It's a lake."

"Right, the fake ocean."

"The lake."
This "Who's on First?"-like conversation goes on for entirely too many blocks on our way to the Walker Brothers Original Pancake House, until we finally figure out that we have been mishearing every word that the other one has been saying.  Such conversational malfunction only confirms our suspicion that no one understands us, including each other.
"Do People Go In There? 'Swimming,' I Suppose Some Might Call It"
By the time we wander into Walker Brothers, we are inexplicably starving, despite our previous day's massive over-consumption.
Whatever This Picture Is Of, We'll Take One of Those, Too
Luckily, unlike the massive line which greeted Vodka the one other time she dined here, we have a plethora of tables from which to choose.
What, No One Likes Pancakes Anymore?!
Due to our aforementioned desire to never talk to anybody, we steer clear of the communal tables inside (seriously, Chicago -- what is with all of this communing?!) and take ourselves to the outside patio.  By ourselves.
Seats Chosen Merely for the Lack of People - Not the Foliage
With our digestive systems finally in remission after yesterday's intake, we decide not to push the issue and order a single one of Melissa D'Arabian's Best Thing I Ever Ate FOR BRUNCH dish to share.  Thankfully, when our bacon with cheese oven-baked omelette arrives, it is approximately the size of a rhinoceros liver, and even better, it comes with a side order of pancakes.
Overactive Portion Size, Much?
"People eat this whole thing by themselves?  This is why you're fat, America," Ginger quips.

Cut to fifteen minutes later, when we have polished off the dish in it's entirety.  Obesity may be right around the corner.
Well, This Is Embarrassing
The omelette itself is thicker and fluffier than the standard variety, almost frittata-like in texture due to its oven baking.
Gaston-Approved Omelette
The contents are enclosed completely in the egg, with the miles of cheddar cheese spilling out onto the plate when it is cut down the center.
Oh Cheese, You're Our Only Friend
The bacon is diced in heavy squares, and all together, the omelette makes for a perfectly enjoyable, cholesterol-raising, down-home American meal.
The Step Above Supersize? Frankensize
And then we come to the pancakes.  Now, we think it is fairly difficult to screw up a pancake, as they all tend to taste similarly.  Walker Brothers's version, however, is truly second to none.
We Have a Sneaking Suspicion Walker Brothers Never Has to Throw Out the First Pancake of a Batch
Thin but cakey, we smother them in butter and maple syrup and nearly collapse from happiness.  Vodka soon begins combining bites of omelette and slices of pancake onto a single fork, which produces a scrumptious salty/sweet combination.
Somebody Make a Sandwich Out of This Combo. You'll be a Millionaire. We Expect Royalties
When our waitress returns and finds our nearly-polished plates, she nods her approval as Ginger pops more Pepto.  "My solution to getting full is to eat as fast as I can before my stomach notices how much I'm shoving in," she explains, which makes even less sense when vocalized than it does in her head.
Hence Why Her Stomach Hates Her
As we depart Walker Brothers and head back to the fake ocean, we note the level of normalcy among the people we pass on the street.

"You don't get the same level of weirdo here that you get everywhere else," Vodka observes.  Until, that is, we take a look at ourselves: the two biggest nutjobs to hit Chicago in years, slowly working their way into self-induced diabetic comas.

Walker Brothers Original Pancake House's Bacon with Cheese Oven-Baked Omelette: 4 stars

No comments:

Post a Comment